Thursday, June 3, 2010

Kumar: My favorite Metrosexual - Fourth Installment

5. You only wear Calvin Klein boxer-briefs.

Kumar claims he's too good for Calvin Kleins. According to him, "It's Hugo Boss or nothing." Nothing as in "al fresco"...hahahahahahahahahaha. Probably not a good idea when he's sporting those pristine white pants which he tops off with his navy gold-buttoned double-breasted sports jacket. One of his most over the top get-ups which he somehow pulls off so well that it looks like second skin. On those days, I bade Kumar goodbye with more than just the usual peck on the cheek and "I Love You." I send him off with a solemn and fervent wish that he does not get stricken all of a sudden with loose bowel movement!!!

6. You shave more than just your face. You also exfoliate and moisturize.

Trivia question for you: Does Kumar have a unibrow or not? Aha, stumped you there, didn't I?! Kumar actually does have one, but then had I not divulged this sensitive information you would never have known. That's because, Kumar faithfully grooms himself, keeping those stray little bugger inter-occular hairs in check before his dirty little secret is made manifest. Being of South Asian descent, Kumar is by default, let's just say "tufty," that's a given. Personally, I don't find body hair on men repulsive nor revolting as some women may. So Kumar will limit his shaving to yes, just his face. It's only when the occasion calls for it that he'll have his back waxed like when we vacation on the Carribean. The remaining 355 days of the year, he allows nature to run the show.

Kumar's facial care regimen includes steaming his face at least twice a week with a hot washcloth followed by a dousing of cold water to, as
he is perfectly aware, close his pores. We also share a tube of St-Ives apricot scrub. Man, he puts me to shame! My nightly ritual, gosh, I can't even call it that! My nightly, uhmm, habit, involves washing my face with plain soap and water followed by a dollop of my drugstore bought hypoallergenic moisturizer which I just slap on and smother all over my face after which I'm good to go! I remember watching a girlfriend of mine during one visit to the spa in complete amazement as she carefully dotted her face with her pricey department store brand moisturizer and smoothed it ever so thoroughly over her entire face and neck....Oh my, I just had a revelation! in recounting this story, I just realized that explains why she's been awkward around me from that day onward. In retrospect, I think she must have totally miscontrued my transfixion as some lesbian inclination?? Oh God, please noooooo!....ooops!!! At any rate, going back to Kumar, yes, he also frequents the spa....

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